What is addiction?
Addiction is a treatable, chronic medical disease involving complex interactions among brain circuits, genetics, the environment, and an individual’s life experiences. People with addiction use substances or engage in behaviors that become compulsive and often continue despite harmful consequences. Prevention efforts and treatment approaches for addiction are generally as successful as those for other chronic diseases. (Adopted by the ASAM Board of Directors | September 15, 2019)
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“Any repeated behavior, substance-related or not, in which a person feels compelled to persist, regardless of its negative impact on his life and the lives of others. ...Current research reveals that there’s nothing about ordinary people that make them more prone to addiction, there’s nothing intrinsic, there’s nothing innate, there’s nothing in their nature, their character that drives them to addiction.”
- Gabor Mate, MD |
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Fr. Sam Portaro, author and former Episcopalian chaplain to the University of Chicago, defined addiction in this way:
“The heart of addiction is dependency, excessive dependency, and unhealthy dependency – unhealthy in the sense of unwholesome dependency that disintegrates and destroys.” (p. 129, In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts).
“The heart of addiction is dependency, excessive dependency, and unhealthy dependency – unhealthy in the sense of unwholesome dependency that disintegrates and destroys.” (p. 129, In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts).
Someone experiencing an addiction will:
- Be unable stay away from the substance or stop the addictive behavior
- Display a lack of self-control
- Have an increased desire for the substance or behavior
- Dismiss how their behavior may be causing problems
- Lack an emotional response
- Over time, addictions can seriously interfere with your daily life.
- People experiencing addiction are also prone to cycles of relapse and remission.
- They may cycle between intense and mild use.
- Addictions will typically worsen over time.
- The addictions can lead to permanent health complications and serious consequences in an individual’s life.
You should absolutely seek treatment if your addiction is:
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"A moment comes for every addict when the consequences are so great or the pain is so bad that the addict admits life is out of control because of his or her sexual behavior." |
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The Backwards Brain Bicycle | Smarter Every Day
A man learns to unlearn his ability to ride a bike by learning how to ride a bike which steers the opposite way. This story is a fascinating practical example of neuroplasticity (the ability of our brains to modify themselves, to change neural pathways). Destin had welders at his workplace modify a bike.
How difficult can it be? Watch and see. . . . |
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This might seem like an easy change to get used to, but it isn't, in good part because riding a bike is cognitively a lot harder than we realize. Consciously, it feels easy once you know how to ride, but your brain is taking into account all kinds of factors and running them through a fairly complex algorithm to keep you going. If you change one of the variables, things stop working.
But make sure to watch to the end, because just as interesting is how Destin practiced riding this weird bike for eight months every day, and how after that he tried riding a normal bike again. Very interesting to see how our brains work! The Backwards Bike, Discipline, and Recovery What does riding a backwards bike have to do with addiction, recovery, and discipline? A lot. |
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SEX ADDICTION
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Sex addiction, also called hypersexuality, hypersexual disorder, sexual compulsivity, and compulsive sexual behavior disorder, is a behavioral addiction focused on sex. More specifically, sex addiction is a dysfunctional preoccupation with sexual urges, fantasies, and behaviors, usually involving the obsessive pursuit of non-intimate sexuality – pornography, casual and/or anonymous sex, prostitution, etc. This adult pattern of sexual urges, fantasies, and behaviors continues for at least six months, despite attempts to either stop or curtail the activity, and directly related negative life consequences – relationship instability, emotional turmoil, physical health problems, career trouble, legal issues, and more.
In short, sex addiction is an ongoing, out-of-control pattern of sexual urges, fantasies, and behaviors that causes problems in a person’s life. Sex addicts use denial, rationalizing, minimizing, and lying to avoid the truth to themselves and others. They typically have difficulty with closeness in committed relationships and use their sexual addiction behavior to escape painful and stressful feelings. The sex addict typically cycles through an addictive cycle of preoccupation, ritualization, compulsive sexual behavior, and despair or shame. Without treatment and recovery, overcoming sexual addiction can be very difficult. Partners and spouses of sex addicts have specific consequences and require help as well. |
Do these questions describe your behavior of the behavior of your partner?
What should I do?lf you are wondering if you or someone you love might be struggling with a sexual addiction, Fr. Greg can help you determine if the symptoms and behaviors you are experiencing indicate a sexual addiction.
Please take the next step and contact Fr. Greg or a sexual addiction counselor you trust if you or someone you love are experiencing:
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TINSA®, or Trauma Induced Sexual Addiction, explores the effects of adverse developmental experiences on a young brain and nervous system and illustrates how the damage caused by those experiences encourages addictive behavior.
Realizing how many sex addicts suffer from abandonment, neglect, and other childhood trauma led TINSA® creator Michael Barta, PhD, LPC, CSAT, to examine how emotional wounding leads to the need to self-regulate the release of the pleasure hormone dopamine through sexual stimuli. As increasing levels of dopamine are required over time to reach the same “high,” by adulthood, self-regulation can produce compulsive, damaging sexual behavior.
Through TINSA®, Barta offers the means to treat sex addiction at the source, reducing compulsive sexual behavior over time and providing effective, long-term recovery.
The Begin Again Podcast | https://www.drmichaelbarta.com/podcast In addition to intensive treatment programs and online courses, Dr. Michael Barta continues to drive his mission to make information for recovery more accessible and feasible to the everyday individual with the Begin Again Podcast. In this podcast, Dr. Barta covers a range of topics related to sex and pornography addictions including the effects of pornography on the brain, the neurology of sex addiction, and the recognizing the trauma that is inflicted onto partners.
Realizing how many sex addicts suffer from abandonment, neglect, and other childhood trauma led TINSA® creator Michael Barta, PhD, LPC, CSAT, to examine how emotional wounding leads to the need to self-regulate the release of the pleasure hormone dopamine through sexual stimuli. As increasing levels of dopamine are required over time to reach the same “high,” by adulthood, self-regulation can produce compulsive, damaging sexual behavior.
Through TINSA®, Barta offers the means to treat sex addiction at the source, reducing compulsive sexual behavior over time and providing effective, long-term recovery.
The Begin Again Podcast | https://www.drmichaelbarta.com/podcast In addition to intensive treatment programs and online courses, Dr. Michael Barta continues to drive his mission to make information for recovery more accessible and feasible to the everyday individual with the Begin Again Podcast. In this podcast, Dr. Barta covers a range of topics related to sex and pornography addictions including the effects of pornography on the brain, the neurology of sex addiction, and the recognizing the trauma that is inflicted onto partners.
To Understand Sex and Porn Addiction, You Need to Understand How the Brain Works
When it comes to sex and porn addiction, talk therapy and abstinence or behavioral-based tools cannot, in and of themselves, give addicts the ability to sustain long-term healing. The core issues behind sex addiction and why you are addicted to sex and/or pornography must be addressed...READ MORE
Sex, Trauma, and the Brain
Human beings are instinctual creatures, but instinct can be skewed by trauma; traumatic events can prevent us from being able to access appropriate responses, especially if they occur early on in life... READ MORE
The Link Between Sex Addiction and Trauma
So many of our patients suffering from sex addiction are baffled by their behavior and where it comes from. Seemingly overnight most sex addicts witness their pursuit of sex morph into something dangerous that threatens their home lives, careers, and relationships... READ MORE
When it comes to sex and porn addiction, talk therapy and abstinence or behavioral-based tools cannot, in and of themselves, give addicts the ability to sustain long-term healing. The core issues behind sex addiction and why you are addicted to sex and/or pornography must be addressed...READ MORE
Sex, Trauma, and the Brain
Human beings are instinctual creatures, but instinct can be skewed by trauma; traumatic events can prevent us from being able to access appropriate responses, especially if they occur early on in life... READ MORE
The Link Between Sex Addiction and Trauma
So many of our patients suffering from sex addiction are baffled by their behavior and where it comes from. Seemingly overnight most sex addicts witness their pursuit of sex morph into something dangerous that threatens their home lives, careers, and relationships... READ MORE
Leon Else - Easy Love (Official Lyric Video)Leon Else’s song delves into some of his most personal and vulnerable moments, as the track is reflective of a time when he was struggling and had developed an unhealthy addiction to fast flings.
"I felt everything was falling apart, and sex became something that was like a drug to me. . . .I used sex as a way of escapism to try and forget the pain of what was happening around me, and it became a monster I needed to continue to feed. The more sex I had, the more I needed it. It would always make me feel worse after, leaving me with an unsatisfied come down, which would lead me to have sex again to make myself feel better. I was constantly chasing a sexual high all the while knowing it wasn’t the answer. It felt like I was losing a piece of myself to every man I had sex with. It was a self-destructive time for me." |
The Courage To Love
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Additional Sex Addiction Recovery Resources
PORN ADDICTION
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Pornography addiction is a behavioral addiction characterized by compulsive, repeated use of pornographic material until it causes serious negative consequences to one's physical, mental, social, and/or financial well-being.
Ten Criteria of Problematic Online Sexual Behavior: (IITAP, 2010)
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The Science of Porn AddictionPlease take 3 minutes to learn more about what we are talking about here. I couldn't have summarized it better myself.
Think about what has changed in our experience of sexual content & sexual contact over the past 20 years:
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Take the Internet Sex Screening Test for free at www.sexhelp.com.
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Jenna Riemersma is the Clinical Director of The Atlanta Center for Relational Healing. She is a teaching faculty member for the International Institute for Trauma And Addiction Professionals (IITAP).
Take a few moments to experience one of her guided meditations. |
"The God-image within us is omnipresent. It is always there waiting like the father of the prodigal son to welcome us home with deep compassion and mercy.
Not only our parts that feel shame, vulnerability, rejection, and loneliness but also those precious parts that have been trying so hard to give us attachment through pornography and even the precious part that's trying to make us good enough, to be good enough for God by spiritualizing in shaming and soothing.
They all get to come home to our deep attachment figure, the God-image within us."
- Jenna Riemersma
Not only our parts that feel shame, vulnerability, rejection, and loneliness but also those precious parts that have been trying so hard to give us attachment through pornography and even the precious part that's trying to make us good enough, to be good enough for God by spiritualizing in shaming and soothing.
They all get to come home to our deep attachment figure, the God-image within us."
- Jenna Riemersma
RESOURCES TO HELP KEEP KIDS SAFE ONLINE
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Young people are especially vulnerable to porn, which is available for free 24/7 via smartphones and on teen platforms like Snapchat and Instagram. We want to make sure you have the tools and tips for keeping your kids safe. One of the simplest ways to take stock of which conversations we need to have with our kids about online safety is to ask when, where, what, why, and how?
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Our Kids Online: What Every Parent Needs to KnowAs parents living in a world where it is the norm for young kids to have their own devices, it was really troubling. We didn’t want our kids exposed to this. We wanted our kids to experience authentic intimacy and mutual respect with sexual partners. We wanted them to experience the fun and excitement that come with healthy sexual relationships, and to learn from the awkward, fumbling around that was a part of our own youth. Instead, the online content that kids could be exposed to would introduce them to confusion about boundaries and consent, and depict violent, degrading acts as “normal” sex. Access to this content well before they had any experience in a real relationship could be so damaging...READ MORE
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“Our Kids Online: Porn, Predators and How to Keep Them Safe” (FILM)This film is a comprehensive look at how children’s natural curiosity, combined with unfiltered, unsupervised access to the internet and accidental exposure to degrading, violent porn and online predators is leading to substantial harm to our children. The film breaks down the potential threats to children and young people, and how this affects them not only individually, but also how it is shaping our entire culture. The last 30 minutes is solution-focused, guiding parents to the resources we have found during our journey, and spending time with some of the world’s leading experts. Watch the Film Preview.
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